Ten Things I Learnt On Tour
Ragged Words likes noisy Yorkshiremen Pulled Apart By Horses a lot. You may have noticed this because unfortunately the release of their blistering debut album coincided with this summer’s World Cup, and, well, not much got done around here for that month. Before we get back to the record to give it a firm thumbs up, bassist (and backing singer) Robert John Lee was kind enough to detail 10 things he’s learned on tour.
To see if the band have headed any of the below lessons, catch them around the UK this September where they’ll be touring around the Sept.6 of their second single 'High Five, Swan Dive, Nose Dive'. Dates here.
1
You’re surrounded by booze at every given opportunity, and no-matter how much the punters might think being wasted all the time adds to the rock star credentials, it’s a slippery slope my friend. Especially when you’re as bad at it as I am! Also, there’s always someone there to take out their own intoxicated guilt on you. Just say NO! Well, maybe just say shandy.
2
How can a pair of such simple things invigorate one’s self esteem so instantly? When packing a bag to go on tour, your A1 priority is: Line the bottom of your bag with every pair of clean socks you own. Every pair? EVERY PAIR! If you do get cut short, they can be washed, along with your body, in the shower, then cheekily slipped on the end of a hair dryer. As well as drying them, you get a rather enjoyable “sock erection” effect. Try it!
3
Try and enjoy as many moments as you can outside the realms of being in a band. The euphoria of playing in front of a crowd that loves your music will take care of itself. Relish the obscure little moments that occur simply because you are in an unusual place.
4
Ignore the people who immediately ask you where the front man is. Also, upon hearing the words, “I really want to talk to your guitarist, where is he?” you have instantly earned the right to be incredibly rude to them. Enjoy!
5
In the live music business, as with many professions, there are two types of people:
1. The talentless ones who merely seek to associate themselves with the idea of ‘fame’ and what it can afford them.
2. Awesome people who genuinely care about music and what it can achieve.
When on tour, seek out the latter and treat them with the respect and politeness that they deserve. In return you’ll pretty much get whatever you want, whenever you want it.
6
If Karma exists then it’s definitely tied very strongly to this notion.
7
I once bought freshly caught tiger prawns which were cooked in front of me in a service station on the way home from Switzerland. KFC is not your only option.
8
People go into a weird meditative state when they’ve been driving for 7 hours. Given this situation you get to do a few cool things: Be as annoying as you possibly can, therefore saving you and the rest of the band from dying in a crash, while simultaneously finding out lots of interesting stuff and forming a stronger bond of friendship with someone you’re going to be spending a lot of time with. Tiredness kills, being an annoying prick does not.
9
When you are cooped-up with three other smelly dickheads for weeks on end, tired, hungry, hungover and homesick, it’s easy to lose your temper. You just have to remember that the music you are creating together and everything you’ve achieved so far is more important than your own silly little ego.
10
Never, ever frivolously give away 10 valuable lesson’s which you have toiled to learn and which elevate you above those without your wealth of knowledge. Ah shit!
In your words